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Eye to Eye – Harassed Eye!

Here we were, thinking that gone are the days of love that leave one in mouth-hanging awe. But with Eye to Eye, the lettist vyral sunsaytion (latest viral sensation), all such previous notions have been laid to rest. Today’s love may still leave you unable to pull that chin up.

Last night was just another one of my battles against a killer combination of inherent insomnia and the gift of load-shedding, when I noticed the twitter-world gradually getting all hyped up about some Taher Shah and his bomb. I figured it was some lame joke going around, and resisted curiosity getting the better of me.

However, after having successfully dodged hundreds of tweets on the subject, when a dear friend  tagged me on a facebook post, I finally gave in, thinking, “Oh, what the heck, I’d rather know what people are talking about than be mocked for being an ostrich”.

Lame is a word used to gently let someone off. This ‘artistic offer’ deserves a public hanging.

The 5th or 6th second of the video gave me goosebumps like no music or video ever before has. I fumbled to pause the video, shaking my head to get rid of the image that had implanted itself like a parasite. I had greatly underestimated the video. It took me a few minutes’ distraction from other tabs in my browser before I could muster up the courage to continue. #DheetKoSawaDheet

Narcissism was a word previously difficult for me to even fluently pronounce; but today I can proudly say I completely understand everything from the spelling through the philosophy right down to the behavioral requirements. What’s with all the accessories, any idea? Like, no aesthetic sense whatsoever in ‘implying’ the lifestyles of the rich and the famous?

By the way, are those extensions he has on?

Because if yes, I wonder why he stopped short of getting his eyebrows done.

And who is exactly is Tee-Ess trying to woo? His own pictures? Or his younger brother?
At least the dance moves though, are to kill for, no? Ok, no. Sorry.

Maybe the adjectives…..alright, alright I give up.

Youngsters teased their movie maker friends, reliving childhood memories with quips like, “This video was made by you! :D” (comparable to, “That’s your favorite person! :D” as you point in the direction of your best friend’s pet peeve of an individual).

I considered starting a twitter trend #StillABetterSongThanEyeyToEye, only to stop myself in the nick of time #Pointless

I kid you not I hit the bed around 11pm, and the last time I checked the time before sleep showed some mercy on me, it was 5:30am! And this had nothing to do with my semi-insomnia. Scarring mental impressions alone are to blame, “Those eyes, those eyes…,” repeated a traumatized Aunt May.

The one good thing I can see coming out of this is that I’ve found the “Allah baba” of the next generation.

The losses, however, are far graver – poetry may very well ban the description of eyes from lovers’ offerings to their person(s) of desire.

Or maybe, some just might! (Refer to fears highlighted with previous image).

If guys like this can call themselves ‘artists’ and get away with it, we are all journalists. As to why I bothered writing about it – hey, we all deserve some closure. Which is unlikely any time soon because I see those tweets still coming in, reporting harassed eyes.

Horror of Horrors!

About Author:

Maliha Abidi – She is a Brand Management, Advertising, & Human Resources Professional. She judges poor grammar & poor Urdu ruthlessly. She tweets as @abidisays

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